I’m totally stealing this format from McSweeney’s and they’d probably do it better, but oh well. I thought it was funny.

• The same things happen over and over. All sense of time dissolves.
• A man on an airplane becomes convinced there’s a gremlin on the wing.
• A woman goes to sleep and finds, when she wakes, that the world has changed entirely.
• The world is destroyed and rebuilt again, all in twenty-two minutes.
• You look into the mirror to find you’re suddenly an old woman.
• The ants are in control. Resistance is useless.
• Santa Claus decides to move to Bermuda.
• A woman meets a man in a bar. They fall in love. Then he tells her he’s going to outer space in the morning.
• The power goes out for three days. By the end, people are resorting to cannibalism.
• Ice. Ice. Everywhere: ice.