Mother’s Day Gifts Mom Actually Wants

IMG_1186Mother’s Day is coming: that awfullest of holidays when Mom ceases to be a person and becomes a flowery figurehead to be showered with bath bombs and perfumes and everything pink because that’s what the card companies told you she wanted, when she’s forced to wait hours for a dismal breakfast in bed or taken out into a crowd to be paraded in front of strangers and fed a lukewarm brunch.

Is it just me? Am I the only one who doesn’t want a scented candle and a card? And don’t get me started on cut flowers. What a waste of money.

I do like the idea of the holiday: mothers should be celebrated. Really, we should be celebrated on our kids’ birthdays, which only occurred because of our bodily suffering (or if they’re adopted, mental suffering–that process is not easy), but the world doesn’t do that so Mother’s Day it is. But guess what, people? Your mother is a person. Revolutionary, I know. Maybe she likes flowers and bubble baths and all the pretty things the stores market for her, but with few exceptions, those gifts are so impersonal. That’s the stuff you give to someone you don’t really know. And if you are blessed enough to have a mother but you don’t really know her, I’d say now is the time to acquaint yourself.

To that end, I’ve made a list of potential Mother’s Day gifts. I can’t tell you what your mom wants, exactly, but I can tell you what I (or other moms I know) would love, and maybe these ideas will spark an idea for your own unique mother.

1. Archery Class

2. A Ride on a Motorcycle

3. A Punching Bag

4. A Cleaning Service

5. Chocolate-Making Lessons

6. Museum Passes

7. Concert Tickets

8. A Nanny

9. A Kitten

10. Paints, Brushes, and Canvas

 

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